Sunday, April 3, 2011

No. I don't want to rebel.

No. I don't want to know nothing.

No. I need to understand instead of hiding from reality.

No. I must be humble and know that Christ is the head of me.

    Either God can do the impossible through you, or he isn’t God. There is nothing God cannot do through me.’

    Lord I know I shan't worry cause there's nothing impossible in You. You're bigger than all my problems. Oh lord. I need your guidance and wisdom. I need you badly. Hold my hand and let me stay strong in You. 

Something that bothers but hard to express.

As time goes by, we changed, we grew up, and we start realizing the truth of life.

We began to seek for love, even if it exist but we couldn't manage to experience it. As sometimes we took it for granted or get used to it, or maybe the love we got ain't enough. Human always have the nature of greeds and they were forever unsatisfiable. But still, there's no wrong we're all hunger for love, as it's the main reason that kept us determine to live.

Sometimes we teens doesn't mean to rebel, but reality encourage to do so. We start having our own conscience,we began to have feelings for everything, and as time goes by, we're even observant out of the caused of curiosity. 

We're seeking for attention. We wanted to be cared and loved. But little we don't know why whenever we faced problem, we wouldn't want to confront to our parents neither share our stories with them. Some of them were always too busy with their work and they often pay less attention on their children. And thus, their children began to search for love when they start to have a mind of their own, and focusing on people who really care and pay attention on them, sometimes even rather to start neglecting what's important - studies. They never care if it's temporary, at least it will always be better than nothing at all. 

But deep inside, we know what we wanted the most is still from our dearest parents, whom love us from the beginning before we were even born yet. Its like suicidal - sometimes you just thought of dying, but in reality you wanted to be saved. Teen oh teens, I, we were still in realizing the truth, we can't conclude anything but we can only do one thing, that is by understanding and putting ourself in our parent's shoe. Maybe they wanted to work hard to show us a good example? I don't know. But we can't deny that they'll love us no matter what, they just don't show. We all made mistake.

song - 活出主的爱



Dad and mum, I'm sorry for making you upset. Thanks for the all sacrifices and I love you guys!

*all picture credits to tumbr

Friday, April 1, 2011

It's a new beginning. Life goes on no matter what.

I first came across the picture of incident from facebook. Clicked in the link where I saw a familiar address as the headlines of the image. First thought is sympathy, and think that it's someone between 20 to 30 years old. I never knew the real story until 5 hours later. I was playing my guitar and wondering where's my dad. Until I saw an incoming message, which made tears roll down from the edge of my eyes.

Besides feeling of condolence, there's something more complex behind. I was having a fight and I'm unhappy with my dad before. And when it's the day I wanted to celebrate my dad's birthday, I get this text saying that the lost in Lee's family. I feel God's speaking, yet still blaming on the tragedy of what reality brought.

1 Corinthians 3-4 - "Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God.""

Death. Frightening in our eyes, but yet different in God's eyes.

God saw you getting tired,
When a cure was not to be.
So He wrapped his arms around you,
and whispered, “Come to me”.
You didn’t deserve what you went through,
So He gave you rest.
God’s garden must be beautiful,
He only takes the best
And when I saw you sleeping,
So peaceful and free from pain
I could not wish you back
To suffer that again.
(by Author Unknown)

To my dearest brother in Christ Eric Lee, sister Lee Ming Wei and family. I don't really know what to say. Besides tears that came out of no where, another thought is, I hope your cheers and your beautiful laughters wouldn't be gone. Know that we are sharing in your sorrow and lifting you up in prayer. May you feel God's comfort and grace all around you. Please stay strong, please take care, God loves you, we love you.

I will not leave you comfortless. I will come to you. - John 14:18